Alternative Perspectives On Attraction - The David Deangelo View
David Deangelo has a bit of a different take when it comes to the concept of attraction. Deangelo is the brain child behind the ebook and company Double Your Dating. His approach to dating and to attraction draws from evolutionary instincts and the notion that women are initially more attracted to strong, confident guys than they are to sensitive ones.
All For The Romance
The key to Deangelo’s perspective on attraction can be seen in his approach to romance. In his view, men are extremely misguided when it comes to romance and what he purpose of romance is. Men believe that romance is a tool to make a woman become attracted to you. Deangelo says this is incorrect and that to use romance successfully they need to think of it as a way to increase a woman’s attraction to you, not as a means of making them attracted to you.
He says another mistake men make when it comes to trying to be romantic is to use too much romance, following the logic that more is better. Men feel the need to compete with Hollywood stereotypes that glorify and naturalise the idea of romance. Deangelo says that rather than doing something romantic every time you see a girl, it is much more effective to do romantic things at random and to do them well. For example, is it more romantic to give a girl a red rose on every date, or to give her flowers out of the blue, and making sure they are her favourite flowers?
Deangelo would argue the second option is a much more effective way to be romantic. It is also important to make sure the acts of romance are sincere and that you are not trying too hard. If this is the case the effect of the romance will be lost and if you are romantic in the same way too regularly, you raise expectations and the effect will be lost.
Deangelo’s perspective on attraction and romance is that less is more and the context of the gestures is vital. A woman is going to be more attracted to a romantic gesture that is small, well thought out and used once in a while than a grotesque and insincere gesture. There will be a greater impact on a woman’s attraction to you approaching romance this way, than trying to do everything you can to be romantic all the time.